Starting around age three or 4, kids
start asking questions. Lots and lots and lots of questions. So
many questions that you think you may go quite mad. So many
questions that you may want to shriek “Because!” or “Don't ask
me that again!” or even “Go away!”
Maybe the hardest questions are the
ones you don't know the answer to. Questions like “Why can't we
stay at the park?” or “Where are my shoes?” are annoying,
especially after multiple go-rounds, but at least you know the
answer! A question like “Why do some of the flowers grow back each
year and other ones you have to plant again and again?” would catch
me off guard. (For the sake of a fair discussion, I just posed a
question I don't know the answer to.) I could show off and say
“Because some flowers are perennials and some are annuals,” but I
wouldn't really be answering the question. The question is about why
there are perennials and annuals, and how they behave differently.
I's perfectly OK to say “I
don't know,” with one caveat – that you follow it up with
“Let's find out.” Every kid is a fountain of natural curiosity,
and you nurture that curiosity not by always providing pat, accurate
answers but by demonstrating that his curiosity delights you. You're
not the encyclopedia – you're his research partner.
An obvious first step is the internet.
But don't let it stop there. Make time for a trip to the library.
The children's librarian is your great friend and ally, a valuable
member of the research team. He or she will remember that Blair is
into butterflies and that Ruthie loves gymnastics. That librarian
will not only help you slake their thirst for information about pet
topics, but will also tend to the expansion
of their interests.
Another wonderful resource is all the
people you know – family, friends and neighbors. Maybe when you're
on a family walk, you could ask that retired guy down the street
who's always puttering in his garden.. Or you and your child could
ask Aunt Kate next time you are Skyping with her. Someone you
already know might be able to solve the mystery of the perennials and
the annuals. In all likelihood, that person will be delighted to
help. And your child will see him or her in a new light.
So it's perfectly OK to say I don't
know. It shows that you're honest, self-aware and humble. All
of this is good modeling. Add to that “Let's find out” and you
demonstrate that you are curious, open-minded and resourceful.
That's pretty good modeling too!
